Making Thanksgiving Comfortable for Autistic Kids

Thanksgiving is a time for family, food, and gratitude, but for many autistic kids, it can also bring stress. The loud noises, unfamiliar foods, big gatherings, and changes in routine can feel overwhelming. As parents, there are ways to make the day more enjoyable and comfortable for everyone.

Understanding the Challenges

Children with autism often thrive in a structured and predictable environment. Sudden changes in schedule or environment can cause anxiety or sensory overload. A study published in the Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders found that autistic children experience higher stress levels during unpredictable events or transitions (Corbett et al., 2009). Knowing this helps parents plan ahead to reduce stress and create a more predictable day.

Plan and Prepare Together

Before Thanksgiving, take time to explain what will happen. Use simple words, pictures, or a visual schedule to show your child what the day will look like, such as getting dressed, driving to Grandma’s house, eating dinner, and playing afterward. According to the National Autistic Society (2022), visual supports can help children with autism understand and manage new experiences more confidently.

If possible, show photos of people who will be there or practice greetings at home. This can help your child feel more familiar and less anxious when meeting relatives.

Create a Calm Space

Large family gatherings can get noisy. It helps to have a quiet space where your child can go if things feel overwhelming. Bring comfort items like headphones, a weighted blanket, or a favorite toy. Research shows that sensory tools such as these can reduce stress and help autistic kids self-regulate in noisy environments (Schoen et al., 2009).

You can also let family members know in advance about your child’s needs. For example, explain that your child may need breaks or may prefer not to hug. Setting these boundaries helps everyone understand and respect your child’s comfort zone.

Offer Familiar Foods

Thanksgiving meals often include new or strong-smelling foods, which can be difficult for sensory-sensitive kids. If your child prefers familiar foods, that’s okay. You can bring a few of their favorite dishes so they still feel comfortable participating in the meal. The goal is inclusion, not perfection.

A study from Appetite (2021) found that autistic children often have strong food preferences and may struggle with unfamiliar textures or tastes (Kral et al., 2021). Respecting these preferences can make mealtime a more positive experience.

Keep Expectations Realistic

The holidays do not need to look perfect. Focus on what feels meaningful and calm for your family. If your child only joins part of the meal or spends more time playing quietly, that’s completely fine. What matters most is that they feel safe, accepted, and loved.

Final Thoughts

Thanksgiving can be a wonderful time for connection when families plan ahead with empathy and flexibility. By creating a predictable routine, offering sensory-friendly options, and preparing loved ones to be understanding, you can make the celebration less stressful and more joyful for your child.

Every small adjustment you make helps your autistic child feel included, and that’s something truly worth being thankful for.

References

Corbett, B. A., Mendoza, S., Abdullah, M., Wegelin, J. A., & Levine, S. (2009). Cortisol circadian rhythms and response to stress in children with autism. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 38(3), 519–528.

National Autistic Society. (2022). Supporting autistic people during holidays and celebrations. https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance

Schoen, S. A., Miller, L. J., & Green, K. E. (2009). Pilot study of the Sensory Over-Responsivity Scales: Assessment and Inventory. American Journal of Occupational Therapy, 63(2), 137–146.

Kral, T. V. E., Eriksen, W. T., Souders, M. C., & Pinto-Martin, J. A. (2021). Eating behaviors, diet quality, and gastrointestinal symptoms in children with autism spectrum disorders. Appetite, 157, 104977. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2020.104977